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Spoiler Alert Thursday: Mad Men predictions

What do you predict will happen in the next season of Mad Men? As for me, I predict the following:

  • Don and Peggy will get together.
  • Betty will be involved in a quintuple murder-suicide.
  • Salvatore will discover that Bert Cooper shares his “predilections” and the two will experience a tender and liberating night of love-making.
  • Sterling Cooper will slowly transition toward becoming a tobacco lobbyist firm.
  • Pete will break into Peggy’s mom’s house and kidnap the baby they conceived, “surprising” his wife with it the next morning and expecting her to be thrilled. She will be.
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August 6, 2009 - Posted by | Spoiler Alert Thursdays

38 Comments

  1. i confess it’s friday already

    Comment by read | August 6, 2009

  2. for me, already in holiday mood it seems, coz can’t work, i’ve checked it’s thursday still

    Comment by read | August 6, 2009

  3. Bert Cooper.

    The last prediction seems pretty right-on to me.

    Comment by ben | August 6, 2009

  4. Corrected.

    Comment by Adam Kotsko | August 6, 2009

  5. Are they going to do another 2 year leap? If so, it’ll be 1964. Betty and Don will be basically estranged, though still living in the same house. There will still only be two children. Don is bitter and disgusted about the “baby” Betty “killed.” He does make several unsuccessful attempts at starting over with Betty, but he’s not able to be totally forthright, and she can see through it. (If he were completely honest with himself and with Betty, he’d have to admit that they are totally not suited for each other.) At some point, she begins to discover that his identity is a fake, but she’s not surprised — it just confirms long-held suspicions that’s something’s not right with Don. Mid-season, Betty will begin having an affair, although hopefully not with that horrible schmucky guy from the stables.

    Peggy has continued to rise through the Sterling Cooper ranks, but now she hits the glass ceiling. What’s that young guy’s name? — Kurt’s partner. He starts getting promoted faster than Peggy, despite being obviously less deserving. Don, who was her mentor and treated her as his protege, distances himself from Peggy now that she’s more successful.

    Joan’s awful fiancé breaks it off with her, because she’s not proper material for a doctor’s wife or something like that. He wants a Betty, not a Joan. I think Roger and Joan may get back together, with something like genuine love from Roger’s end.

    At the end of the season, though, Roger will die, and Don will be elevated to Senior Partner status.

    Also, Adam’s last prediction.

    Comment by jms | August 6, 2009

  6. The death of Roger seems like a great call. How would the partnership issue work with the merger, though?

    Comment by Adam Kotsko | August 6, 2009

  7. Setting aside the issue of “Mad Men” (it is black listed on the basis of Christina Hendricks who was intolerable in “Firefly”), there are some issues from “True Blood” I wish to explore:

    (1) What is the nature of Eric’s game with Bill by having Morena return? Eric already has as much access to Sookie as he needs.
    (2) Speaking of Morena, I hope Bill finds a way to kill her or something soon, because the past two episodes of him having flashbacks to the thirties was more than a little boring. Although, it was charming when he said, “it is just nihilism.” The things that come out the mouths of vampires!
    (3) Jessica and Hoyt have most certainly displayed Pam and Jim as top TV couple.
    (4) Who grabbed the former bellhop? The arm that grabbed him appeared to come out of Eric’s room after Eric had left.
    (5) Clearly Godric is at the Fellowship of the Sun of his own free will. The relevant question is why Godric thinks handing himself over to fanatics for a sacrifice is the best way to commit suicide?
    (6) Instead of having Sarah kill Jason, Steve should have had Jason kill Sarah.
    (7) Despite having apparently been shot in the chest, I doubt Jason is dead. And, where the fuck has he been running for hours? I know Jason is conventionally stupid, but why stick to roads?
    (8) Andy Bellefleur is now Chris Bauer’s definitive role.

    Comment by Craig | August 6, 2009

  8. I forgot all about the merger! Um, I predict the merger will fall through?

    Comment by jms | August 6, 2009

  9. A friend of mine co-wrote a forthcoming episode, but I got nothing for you.

    Comment by Wrongshore | August 6, 2009

  10. Also, the “Recent Posts” column suggests that The Weblog recently ran a post titled “Wednesday Food: Pickled Vegetables Awkwardness”, which I’m sorry I missed.

    Comment by Wrongshore | August 6, 2009

  11. Because s/he didn’t tell you, or because you won’t tell us, wrongshore?

    Comment by ben | August 6, 2009

  12. Wrongshore, an episode of Mad Men, or of True Blood?

    Comment by jms | August 6, 2009

  13. It seems fitting to me that for Craig, the deal-killer on Mad Men is the actress who has revolutionized many people’s concepts of sexiness, i.e., one of the most significant selling points of the show.

    Comment by Adam Kotsko | August 6, 2009

  14. I gather you didn’t see “Firefly.”

    Comment by Craig | August 6, 2009

  15. The only thing Joss Whedon has every “created” that I could stand was that Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog. I cannot for the life of me figure out how you’ve managed to watch more than 10 minutes of True Blood.

    Comment by Anthony Paul Smith | August 6, 2009

  16. What do you have against vampires?

    Comment by Craig | August 6, 2009

  17. Why is “created” in quotation marks?

    And how has Hendricks revolutionized many people’s concept of sexiness?

    Comment by ben | August 6, 2009

  18. I should like clarification as well: how is fake red hair and large breasts in anyway “revolutionary”?

    Comment by Craig | August 6, 2009

  19. She’s bringing curvy back!

    Comment by Adam Kotsko | August 6, 2009

  20. I doubt she’s even a size 12 – hardly “curvy”!

    Comment by Craig | August 6, 2009

  21. If I had to guess: size 8 at the largest. Again, hardly curvy. Except, perhaps, in comparison to Mischa Barton.

    Comment by Craig | August 6, 2009

  22. Further predictions:

    Sal begins making secretive visits to Christopher Street bars. He meets a nice gentleman and falls in love. He considers leaving his wife. Then his lover is arrested by an undercover cop (part of the sting operation to rid the city of vice in time for the World Fair). When the lover gets out of jail, he becomes an activist, which terrifies Sal. Sal leaves him, totally brokenhearted.

    Peggy’s sister will catch Peggy and the priest sharing their first (relatively chaste) kiss, and gets him kicked out of the parish. She also tells Peggy never to come back to her home again. Peggy, who was previously uninterested in having contact with her daughter, is unaccountably destroyed by the news that she is now prohibited from seeing her.

    Also, I think Don, as president, will make Peter the head of account services.

    Comment by jms | August 6, 2009

  23. Also, I think Don, as president, will make Peter the head of account services.

    Well, duh.

    Comment by ben | August 6, 2009

  24. Is it obvious? It seems almost equally likely that Don will screw Peter over.

    Comment by jms | August 6, 2009

  25. Incidentally, someone told me yesterday that Christina Hendricks is going to marry Geoffrey Arend, from 500 Days of Summer. (That was a truly horrible movie, but Arend is pretty cute.) Anyway. Apparently they met and had their first date at, respectively, the Magic Castle and the Prince, two of my favorite places in Los Angeles. I love Joanie more all the time.

    Comment by jms | August 6, 2009

  26. The brilliant thing is that either option qualifies as a “well, duh”!

    Comment by ben | August 6, 2009

  27. But really, why would Don screw him? Peter helped Don out, when (for all Peter knew, not knowing that Don didn’t have a contract) there wasn’t actually much in it for him. It seems foolish to screw someone over who’s just done that.

    I am disappointed to learn that 500 Days is horrible.

    Comment by ben | August 6, 2009

  28. Because, at bottom, Don dislikes, or disliked, Peter. It was decent for Peter to give Don the heads-up, but that’s the first decent thing Peter’s ever done.

    Also, I don’t believe Don cares that deeply about the job. He’ll land on his feet anywhere. It’s fun for him to be able to stick it to Duck Phillips in front of the Brits, and Peter’s enabled him to do that, but he loves the gamesmanship, and if he’d left SC with a pile of buyout money and the challenge to make it to the top at some other firm, he would have loved that too.

    The one thing that he does care very deeply about is the security of his identity, and Peter threatened him on that level. The time that Peter tried to blackmail him was the closest Don ever came to cracking. Peter’s one good turn doesn’t necessarily make up for that. Also, Peter knows Don’s secret, which makes him untrustworthy.

    So, I don’t think it’s obvious that Don will help Peter out, but Don does seem, for whatever reason, to have forgiven Peter, and I agree that it feels likely.

    Comment by jms | August 6, 2009

  29. Curvy never left. In the words of Kanye West: “Welcome to the good life / where we like the girls who ain’t on TV / ’cause they got more ass than the models.” One of those girls just managed to end up on TV. I think Kanye speaks rather authoritatively for the masses, however.

    Comment by Hill | August 6, 2009

  30. OOH! OOH! What if Pete breaks into Peggy’s family’s place as I say — but then steals the wrong baby?!

    Comment by Adam Kotsko | August 7, 2009

  31. I don’t have anything against vampires, just badly written shows involving them. I don’t know why created was in quotation marks. Why is your name in lower-case?

    Comment by Anthony Paul Smith | August 8, 2009

  32. Basically, my name is in lowercase because when I started commenting on blogs lo these many years ago, many people used pseudonyms which they didn’t capitalize (or for that matter real names which they didn’t capitalize), and in that environment it seemed ostentatious, a little, to capitalize my name. And it’s stuck that way ever since, inertially, like.

    Now that I’ve answered your question, may I observe that it was stupid? After all, in any particular instance, I don’t have to type my name, since it’s been remembered for me, and I don’t have to think about it at all. You, on the other hand, definitely had to write ‘”created”‘ rather than ‘created’.

    Comment by ben | August 8, 2009

  33. In many circles, including those present on blogs, people put things in quotation marks to indicate that they are using a word somewhat sarcastically. Obviously I know Whedon created something in some sense, I was indicating, as I’m sure most people realized, that I didn’t find it very creative as such. I’m sure it comes from Chris Farley. Now I hardly see how it was even something to bring up, much like asking why you use lower-case for your name and I’m fairly certain that you, not being an idiot, know what a sarcastic quotation mark is.

    Comment by Anthony Paul Smith | August 8, 2009

  34. Ah, so you did know!

    But he did create it, whether or not it is creative—and anyway I, being “in” on the convention, was really asking, in asking you why you used the sarcasmoquotes, thought the quotations marks were here to be used.

    Comment by ben | August 8, 2009

  35. Yes, but why? Why do you care? Quick think of something witty and cutting! Or, if you’re in a pinch, just go with cutting.

    Comment by Anthony Paul Smith | August 8, 2009

  36. Guys, I am shocked that you think a comment thread is an appropriate forum for personal acrimony.

    Comment by Adam Kotsko | August 9, 2009

  37. 12: Mad Men.

    Comment by Wrongshore | August 9, 2009

  38. I learned it from you!

    Comment by Anthony Paul Smith | August 9, 2009


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