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Friday Afternoon Confessional: Anxiety never lies

I confess that I am a chapstick addict and lost my chapstick on Monday. I thought to myself, “Oh, this will be a good chance for me to be tough and get over my chapstick addiction.” By Thursday night, it was getting painful — to the point where it was actively distracting to my train of thought, though not yet to the level where I wanted to walk the mile-plus round trip to Walgreen’s. I confess that I still kind of think I’m going to find it somewhere in my apartment, even though I’ve already done thorough searches.

I confess that I often put off a simple task because I have exaggerated ideas of what it will take to achieve it. Most recently, I was stressed out about getting my book order in for next quarter. Now, I know exactly what books I want to use. I know that the amount of reading they represent “fits” well into the time allotted. In fact, I’ve even completed the syllabus for one of the classes, and the other is a repeat. Nonetheless, I somehow convinced myself that I had to have a full syllabus laid out before I submitted the book order — a process that I was sure would take hours upon hours, even though it consists of slightly altering the paper assignments from last time I offered the course and dividing up the readings so that it’s pretty much the same amount for each class session. Not only did I impose the burden of completing the syllabus when it wasn’t necessary, but I hugely exaggerated what the syllabus required. If anyone knows why I do this, I’d be interested to learn.

I confess that I checked my K College voicemail for the first time in over a year yesterday. I had no new messages.

I confess that I have significantly reduced my coffee intake as compared to last school year and show no signs of the quarter-end increase that I came to expect. In fact, I’m increasingly unsure that coffee significantly contributes to my quality of life — but I don’t want to quit altogether because I think people quit things too often. Plus The Girlfriend would likely break up with me if I gave up coffee.

I confess that I wish there were a way that I could go to AAR without missing a weekend with The Girlfriend. I don’t know how people do hardcore long-distance relationships, of the kind where you might see each other once a month rather than several days out of every week.

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October 22, 2010 - Posted by | Friday Afternoon Confessional

4 Comments

  1. I usually drive with essentials on the seat between my legs–phone and lip balm. The other day I got out of the car at the convenience store and my lip balm fell out and rolled under the car. I figured I would get it on the way out: I’d back up a bit, get out of the car, pick it up, and continue on with my life. While backing out of the spot–not even all the way–some old man with a Jesus-fish on the back of his car “bogarted” my parking spot. I never got my lip balm back. To make this a confession: I confess to wondering if it was a hate crime to punch an old man with a Jesus fish on his car in the back of the head for being a giant dick.

    Comment by Craig | October 22, 2010

  2. i confess i didn’t know what chapstick means, couldn’t be chopsticks to miss them that badly cz i for example use them only to eat instant noodle
    lip balms, i used to use lipstick in my twenties, of the most natural color, nothing too red
    my best friend used to use only orange, another acquaintance of mine only purple colour, she underwent laser surgery on her eyes, together with me, so i wondered whether purple is the easiest colour left to see when one is near blind b/c her everything was purple

    Comment by read | October 22, 2010

  3. i confess i eat instant noodles at least twice a week, should try to stop eating them cz afterwards the apartment smells of MSG/rodents so have to open all the windows to get rid of the smell

    Comment by read | October 22, 2010

  4. I usually drive with essentials on the seat between my legs

    You and me both, brother.

    Comment by ben | October 22, 2010


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